This song was written as I was reading Romeo and Juliet in Theatre school. Give me my sin again is the line Romeo says to Juliet right after kissing her for the first time.

I really wanted to stick to the theme of star-crossed lovers for the artwork, so I decided to scour the myths for a tale to match Romeo and Juliet's. I found many but none that really resonated as well. Through my research, I began rereading Medusa's tale and I began asking many questions. Why was Medusa being punished for being a victim? The myth claims Medusa, priestess to Athena, was transformed by Athena into the snake haired beast after being raped by Poseidon only to be later beheaded by Perseus (at the request of Athena). It sounds like Athena was angry at Medusa for something. Me thinks Medusa, renounced her vows to Athena for the love of Poseidon. This would explain why Athena punishes Medusa instead of Poseidon. Or getting her father, Zeus (king of the gods), to punish her uncle Poseidon.

Getting laid was written before I ever had sex actually. I think I was 17 at the time and had envisioned the scenario described in the song.  I later envisioned a music video where a Dionysian orgy happening in a room of a small prestige hotel. The orgy would be so loud and obnoxious that the other guests start banging on the room door trying to put it to an end. When they do finally barge into the room, they are compelled to join in as well. just and idea.

The artwork for the song was inspired by the Dionysian orgies held by the followers of the cult. 

I wrote this song shortly after the first sexual encounter I had. With just one taste, I was hooked. Love is a drug was written a little bit after Love at first sight at 19. I clearly had strange notions as to what love is. Maybe the Disney movies made me believe that falling in love something that was instantaneous, in any case, I think I grew addicted to the feeling of falling in love. Not knowing that falling out of love was the most unpleasant rehab.

The mytholical moment I decided to portray this song with is when Dionysus and Aphrodite got together. I found it appropriate to have the Goddess of Love bedding the God of Wine. I suited the name of the song beautifully.

I wrote My Sweetie Pie's original lyrics as a teenager. at the time I was still coming to terms with my sexuality. I had a yearning for love, but no real outlet. I wrote out this yearning for a love in these lyrics. I dreamed of this angel that would give up paradise to be with me, kind of like the movie: City of Angels with Meg Ryan and Nicholas Cage (I'm a sucker for a good rom-com). 

Anyway, throughout the song, it talks about an ideal lover finally arriving, it never talks of knowing them in the past.

When designing the artwork for this song, I chose the moment Pysche discovers her husband is Eros/Cupid. It just matched so perfectly.

Incantation was written at around 20. I was seeing someone at the time, which invoked a lot of insecurities. as the lyrics elude, I was unsure in how my partner liked to be loved. The reality is that this sentiment prevailed in every relationship that followed as well. The desire to please your lover. I recently came to realize that this sentiment is counter-productive. The way to love is to be yourself, as you are, with considerations to the feelings of others. I have learned to accept that I am not what everyone is looking for and not everyone will always be able to satisfy my needs. The real magic in love is when it happens effortlessly.

The meeting of Hades and Persephone was selected as the image to this song. Hades fell under Persephone's charm the second he set eyes on her and must have wondered if she truly loved him back. This theme is prevalent in all the four selected myths, but with the dark tones of the song, the king of the underworld seemed the best candidate for the image.

Love at first sight's lyrics were written when I was nineteen. I still was not fully accepting of my own sexuality at the time. I had moved to Montreal to study professional theatre. I had moved a month before school started and one day was rather bored. I decided to go walking down the main road in downtown Montreal, Sainte Catherine, and see what I find. when I started the day, I was unaware of two things, that the gay village was on Sainte Catherine street and that on this day was scheduled, Diverscité, a rave party to celebrate lgbtq diversity. A Gay Pride of sort. This was a party like I had never seen. It was not until ten after ten minutes of walking around a bit that I started to clue in to the gayness in the air. Men dancing in their underwear, men kissing one another, a shockingly made up female impersonator on stage. It took a second to switch off my internal red alert, but I accepted where I was and told myself that I wasn't doing anything better at the moment. So I joined the party. After a while, and one or two alcoholic beverages, I saw a man that tickled my fancy and the rest is history. the next day, I wrote this song. Although I did not fall in love with the man I met that day in Diverscité, I was so taken by my experience of instant infatuation with a man, that I wrote Love @ First Sight.

I chose these lyrics to be the first song on the album mainly thanks to the title and the concept behind it. Falling in love with someone the second you see them. I chose the moment when Eros/Cupid himself falls in love with the mortal Psyche by pricking himself with his arrow while marvelling at her beauty.

This is long overdue, but with the state of the world as we know it in 2020 and my sudden preoccupation with a new album among other pandemic things, I forgot to let you guys know how my debut album, The Rise & The Fall, came to be.

In 2017, I went through a rather bad separation with my ex-fiancé. This led me down a rabbit hole of sorts and in 2018, I began to vent my frustrations and trauma through songwriting. I began looking for musicians that could help me create music to lyrics or melodic poems I had been writing and singing to myself for years. Some of which I wrote as early as 15. Through some trail and error I gradually discovered more about music theory, which until recently, seemed like an other-worldly language. I'm not going to pretend like my debut album is my best work. I will say that it was an incredible outlet to process the revelations I came to at the end of my engagement and helped me learn A LOT about songwriting, music theory and music production. Oh! and myself of course, can't forget that.

I wanted form an album depicting a relationship from beginning to the end. (Plot twist, no relationship ever ends. it just changes for better or worse. Even the memory of that person continues the relationship)

I scavenged the archives of lyrics I had written over the years, looking for any song related to love, relationships and heartache. I even wrote; Porcelain Heart specifically for my ex-fiancé after the break up. From my lyric archive, I drew out: Love @ First Sight, Incantation, Sweetie Pie, Love is a Drug, Getting Laid, Give Me My Sin Again, Push Came to your Shove, Ghost of Me and Thinking of you.

I began playing with Garageband on my phone to try to create music to make it easier to explain my vision to a music producer. Thankfully, my friend and first music producer, Drew Chale, patiently explained my stubborn ass the complexities of music theory that perplexed me enormously. I would likely have given up were it not for his guidance.

For the album visuals, I wanted each song to have it's own visual. I started at the root with love being the most universal element of the album. I asked myself what else was universal and concluded with mythology. Tales as old as time. Many if not most, dealing with love. Each song would be a moment in a myth. I originally wanted to strictly depict moments in the myth of Eros and Psyche, but since many of the songs I had selected for this album touched on subjects that were not apparent in this myth. I instead, used moments from four different myths, Eros & Psyche,

Hades and Persephone,

Dionysus and Ariadne

and the cursed love of Poseidon and Medusa.

Playing out these tales like major and sub-plots woven into a Shakespearean tragedy of sorts. I think it would be awesome if one day there was a musical theatre production interweaving all these myths. I would call it, The Rise & The Fall of the Gods. 

The world has really changed a lot in the past 4 months.This pandemic has changed everyone's social lives and "normal" seems so far off right now. My personal world was greatly affected by the death of George Floyd. It began peeling away the sugar coated layers to many people I love, showing me some pretty rotten cores. I feel like I am beginning to really see clearly.

In June, I was laid off from my bread and butter job instilling the natural worry that comes with this uncertain time. All the time has really allowed me to reflect on many things. Predominantly in my own privilege of being able to over look inequalities or not having my physical appearance as a restriction in my life. I began realizing many things. These gears clicking have began constructing a new album about seeing clearly in 2020.

I've started collaborating with another artist on a new single. So far, this single is exhibiting influences of Billy Talent, Alexisonfire and Rise Against. I'm hoping to meld in some Rage Against the Machine influences into the album.

STAY TUNED!!!

NEW YORK! NEW YORK! I desperately needed to shoot a scene in front of the statue of liberty

and desperately wanted a shot of the Brooklyn bridge for the music video

so I made my way there. This is all when the Covid-19 situation was starting to get serious. 

I stayed the first night with my super sexy friend Jack Mackenroth. We kept our clothes on this time, but it was really nice to catch up with him.

That day the state on NY disallowed all gatherings of more than 500 people so all broadway shows and all events in the city were canceled. I was hoping to catch a broadway musical while in town. But that wasn’t happening now. 

The following two nights I stayed with former drag queen, Helvetika, who ravaged me from behind at night. We were supposed to attend a party hosted by Helvetika’s roommate, titled; Harder, but due to the new Covid-19 regulations, it was cancelled. So we watched birdcage instead. 

I always love NYC, but with all the cancellations, I decided to cut my trip short. Upon returning to Toronto, I had to self isolate for 14 days as a preventative measure against the spread of the virus. At least I had plenty of time to work on the music video now.

Along with the last minute decision to fly to Kyoto, I had simultaneously decided to take the early morning Shinkansen bullet train ride back to Tokyo.

I fell asleep shortly after boarding the train and awoke to catch a glimpse of Mount Fuji as we zipped past it. 

Arriving in Tokyo, I had originally planned to walk to all the locations I want to film. After walking from to terminal to Tokyo tower,

then to the Shibuya crossing,

I opted to take some of the local trains to the other locations I needed to film in.

But first, I NEEDED to find an sushi restaurant. I couldn’t after all go to Japan and not have sushi. The first three sushi restaurants I inquired with had an hour to an hour and a half of a wait for an available table. I finally found a really cool sushi restaurant with conveyer belts transporting covered dishes of fresh sushi. I can’t remember the last time I ate that much. 

After I was done filming, I headed to Haneda airport to take my first class seat on my flight back home to Toronto. After this trip, I needed a good 14 hours to lay back and relax.

At the last second, I decided to spend a day in Kyoto. No regrets.

I loved the old Japanese temples, especially Fushimi Inari Taisha, with the orange tunnel of traditional temple gates. What a sight to behold. 

I also was fortunate to witness a traditional Japanese wedding. I walked into the proceedings just as the beautiful bride was walking down the aisle. There was such a humble elegance to everything that was occurring around me. 

Japanese cuisine is one I also enjoy to indulge in. A savoury Ramen is always a good idea and I had the selection of some exquisite broths. I knew that I would be happy and satisfied with whatever I pointed at on the menu. 

My hotel accommodations had some state of the art features. Heated toilet seat, bidet, the room even came with a cell phone in case  I needed one for my stay. I was thoroughly impressed with every precaution or consideration taken by my Japanese hosts.

I landed in Bangkok in the early morning hours. Made my way through the confusing different privately owned public transportation systems and arrived to my accommodations after try to decipher the foreign street signs.

I settled down for a jet lag relieving nap before meeting up with a friend from my adolescence and his girlfriend for some REAL Thai food (my favourite style of cuisine). I was very pleased. 

I want to formally apologize to the thai people I offended walking around in a tank top. I was told by my friend that showing your shoulders is disrespectful. This is after I had been through a few buddhist temples in my bright pink and nip slip prone tank top. 

I had quite the scare my first night in Bangkok. I had accidentally deleted ALL of the footage I had gathered for the music video. All of it. Fortunately, that same friend from my adolescence is also a tech wiz. He managed to recover all of my video, including the video I made with my “Husbear” in Sao Paolo that I had deleted after uploading. Trying to be helpful, my friend picked a video at random to make sure they were all recovered and stumbled upon a very sizeable phallus preparing to penetrate me. It takes a lot to make me blush. I was tomato red.

My favourite city in the world. Istanbul has an indescribable beauty that touches on the mystique of the middle east with European sophistication. This was my second time in this beautiful city and I was only here for just over 24hours. 

Istanbul is probably the most important city to the trip as it is the city mentioned in the chorus of the song “Push came to your Shove”. I needed to shoot by the blue mosque, the Hagia Sofia and the Grand Palace. 

I scored a discounted hotel close to all the locations for a mere $26 for the night. The hotel having had low occupancy this season due to recent terrorist attacks gave me a complimentary upgrade to a very nice room. I quickly showered to meet up with a friend to go to dinner with a group (If you’ve never had Turkish food, you have no idea what you are missing) 

I would have loved to have my friends give me his Turkish delight but it seems circumstances were not in favour of that unfortunately. Maybe next time.

If there is a country i NEED to visit again, it’s Greece. Athens glows with an aura of antiquity. I relished in the beauty of the people and the ruins scattered throughout the city. I arrived at my accommodations in mid afternoon, took a quick shower, and scurried to the Acropolis to try and get a sunset shot. I unfortunately got there shortly after they closed for the day, but this is actually very lucky because the next day was the first Sunday of the month. I was not aware of this ahead of time, but the first Sunday of the month, all museums in Athens (maybe Greece, I don’t know) are free of charge. I went to EVERY archeological site in Athens. 

I found a very sexy virile man to give me a great Greek experience. (Like that of the ancient Athenian men gave to their apprentices) 

He guided me to a restaurant to stuff my face with delectable traditional Greek cuisine, then back to his place to stuff the other end.

Luckily I had a very good discounted rate for my accommodations since ended up sleeping at his place both of my nights in Athens.

I got off the train in the Rome train terminal from Milan and took public transit to my accommodations near the Vatican city.

Rome was another city where I was planning on filming in a lot of locations. St. Peter’s Basilica,

Sistine Chapel,

Pantheon,

the Trevi fountain,

the Colloseum

& the Altare della Patria. 

Rome has a population that makes Parisians seem polite. Canadians can be mild mannered at times, but we bite back when provoked. While chowing down at an overcrowded mcdonalds, a woman with two kids asks to sit in my booth. I tell her that since I have already given the other side of the booth to someone, there is not enough room. She ignores me and squeezes everyone in. 

The kids, being super excited about their happy meal toy, spill their drink on the table. Seeing this, the woman grabs her food and scurries to the next table that just became available. I ask the woman to simply clean up the mess she made since I am still sitting there. She ignores me. I repeat myself louder. She responds, “does the table belong to you?” I respond, that I am still sitting here and don’t appreciate sitting in coca cola. She sucks her teeth at me. I proceed to spill the rest of her children’s drink over her current table, food and it splashes on her as well. Rude. 

Chatting on Scruff, I connected with a French man, living in Montreal, in Rome for a work conference. This gentleman is also a very talented photographer going on Instagram by the username: hedonist_art (check him out) and I was honoured to have been invited to pose for him. I also consider myself fortunate to have taken his impressive member after the photoshoot in addition. All this, hours before catching my flight to Athens.

I had originally planned to film in Venice, but seeing that it was flooded, I decided on another city nearby. Milan seemed an ideal choice, plus a handsome adult entertainer planned to make some content with me, only to flake... gays. 

Anyway, I was DYING for some authentic Italian pasta (I was not disappointed with what I found)

Other that hungry for Italian food, I was thirsty for a hung italian dude. I found a Daddy with the previously mentioned attribute to fulfill my specific need, putting me in good spirits for the next day. 

I met up with a really good friend I made while in India doing my yoga certification. I attended her 6:30am yoga class

and after that she helped me film on Il Navigli on a venetian gondola.

She brought me to some spectacular restaurants, and countless cafes while walking aimlessly through the streets of Milan.

Paris is one of those cities where the city is beautiful and the people can put you off. Luckily I have friends in the city so I always have a great time. Since I was only going to be in the city for two nights, my friends were gracious enough to offer me a place to sleep. 

They fed me a “Raclette” which is quintessentially melted cheese on potatoes with charcuterie meats, but let me tell you, after about almost two weeks of a meat prominent diet, potatoes and cheese were a welcome change! 

The next day I had SEVERAL locations to cover; L’arc de triomphe, Eiffel tower,

the Louvre,

Notre Dame,

Mont Martre

and Moulin Rouge.

I ended up walking over 30km that day. My friends invited me to their favourite sushi restaurant (again a welcome change) 

I wish I could have had some french dick while in Paris, but suffice to say, I was too busy filming, too tired from walking afterwards, and my friends’ dicks are great (speaking from experience) but I think that I have grown too old for their preferences. (You win some, you lose some)

I landed into Madrid after a very long over night flight. I arrived at my hotel WAY before I could check in (6am) and fell asleep on the couch in the lobby while the hotel held onto my luggage. A few hours pass and I awake to complete my check in, shower, and begin to walk around the city. 

Madrid has a mind boggling beauty about it. I did find that the people in the streets had no sense of personal space and would deadhead to a destination regardless of what or who stood in their path. 

On Scruff, most of the men did not inspire a physical meet up. (I had heard horror stories about hookup robberies or sexy street pickpockets, so my guard was up) 

I was hoping to create some fan content while here being the supposed porn capital of Europe, but I wasn’t able to reach any adult entertainers. All the men I chatted with on scruff were either escorts or suddenly were, “hanging out with someone(s)” and wanted them to join. (How some of the horror stories I heard started). 

I was fortunate to meet up with a DJ I respect named Thiago for coffee and he later invited me to a club called Zarpa Bear. I had great time. Although I did not get the pleasure of Thiago’s legendary dick (I don’t think I’m his type) I had a blast hanging out with him :)

Landing in Buenos Aires, i had a sexy Daddy pick me up from the airport. We headed straight to his place to drop off my luggage and a load in his throat, then to various locations around the city to film scenes for the music video. These locations include: La Boca, Puerto Madero and La Recoleta. 

If you know South America, other than Peru, most of the South American countries eat almost nothing but Steak. After a few days in Brazil, I was happy Daddy brought me to a delicious Peruvian restaurant. If you’ve never tried Peruvian cuisine, I highly recommend it. 

This was not my first time in Buenos Aires (nor will it be my last) so I knew EXACTLY where I wanted to film. My only disappointment was that I missed “La Bomba del Tiempo,” which is an incredible drum circle rave (best way I can describe it). Although I missed this party, my Argentinian Daddy brought me to a really cool outdoor eatery covered in really intricate decorative pieces of art. The food was spectacular! And desert at Daddy’s place after was delectable. I was in Heaven.

I landed in Rio and booked my hotel on Expedia with a last minute deal. I wanted to stay near the beach in Ipanema and I thought I had booked that, only after I had finished the transaction, I discovered that my accommodations were in Santa Teresa, which is a rather posh area of the city, on top of a hill a good distance away from Ipanema. At first I was disappointed, I was thinking of all the uber costs I was going to incur between my place and all the places I had planned on filming in the city already.

When I arrived to my accommodations, I had a complete change of heart. Seeing the view I had inspired a spectacular sunrise shot for the music video. One thing this trip really helped me appreciate is that, "Everything happens for a reason." I would never have had this spectacular shot without it.

One of the first things I like to do when I am alone in a new city is to log into Scruff, a gay dating/hookup app, and chat with the local trade to find out what the Tea is. The best restaurants, the best events happening, the best dick to suck, ect. 

One chat in particular grew into a meeting for food and drinks followed by a sunset return to my accommodations. He offered to help me film some of the scenes I needed for the music video and I am so thankful he did. We climbed Montana Azucar, went to the beach and walked around Ipanema. I love walking around a city with a local. I gives me a unique perspective of the city.